A Human Approach

Jae Rang Headshot

The Price of Drainers

Did anyone give you the advice to always hire people smarter than you?

I started my business when I was 23 so this advice was a bit of a conundrum.  Firstly, define “smarter”?  Secondly, at 23 it felt like just about everyone was smarter (or more experienced) than I. Thirdly, if they were smarter in an area of expertise different than mine, how was I to effectively measure their performance? I figured since I was supposed to be the visionary and leader, I should have all the answers.

But I also felt the same way when I started doing talks – that I was hired as the authority and should have all the answers. However, what I experienced in meeting with many people after my presentations was that I learned at least as much from them as they did from me.

Loral Langemeier, in a workshop I did with her years ago, recommended “lead by integration”, which meant that you needed to have enough info on each area of your business (or life) in order to know who to hire, who to hang with, who to learn from, and who to follow in order to become a great leader.

In my evolution from 23 to now, I’ve met, worked with, built with, associated with, collaborated with, and been friends with literally thousands of people, and only a handful of, say, a couple hundred, are still close in my company today.  Those thousands of individuals brought value and brought meaning to our work or life together, but how is it that we’re not all still closely associated?

Aha!  ~  As your life changes, so will your circle

They say you’re a sum-total of the five people you hang with most often.  So, unless you’re all growing together and in tandem – which we know is not possible nor supportive of our individual personal development – people will come and go.

That break-up is not always easy, but sometimes the company you keep is blocking your blessings.

Here’s a way to evaluate if your inner circle is favourable to you:
1)      Do they inspire (or drain) you?
2)      Do you share similar values? 
3)      Do they love you?

“You can’t hang out with negative people and expect a positive result”, says Sandra Hall-Connor, but I think it’s even more than that.  You are naturally inspired by people who share your values and convictions and to love another, you need to love yourself first, right?  Those commonalities make the relationship feel so natural and are advancing to both you and the other.

Don’t be surprised, though, if those with whom you share inspiration, admiration, love, and support come from different backgrounds, are at different ages, and are at a different stage in their journey than you.  None of that matters.  What does matter is that you give yourself the company that brings you great joy.  You deserve it.

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