Aha! Moment Monday
Where do you place your trust?
Do you trust yourself? The quick answer is likely, YES!, but oddly enough studies show we often have more confidence in others than ourselves.
Of course, there are trust accounts, trustees, trust in a process and trust in a higher power and for each there may be assigned values on how you decide to trust … or not. Is trust a given?
Years ago, we worked on a project to create a custom product to be sold online. Honestly, it was the project of my dreams as there were so many elements of possibility and creativity and the client came referred. I enthusiastically jumped in with both feet and worked on the logo mark and brand colours, the factories that would be used to prepare and package and everything in between. It was beyond-exciting where hardly a day went by that the client and I weren’t in development mode together and I gave no second thought to going the extra mile – literally or figuratively – to ensure all aspects of our project were exactly as required. The potential was huge, and the work was fun.
After months of investment, and just as we were ready to push the launch button, the client unexpectedly shifted gears and once they had all details of the program in hand, they went ghost … then I received a letter dismissing me from the project. Eight months of dedicated building with nothing to show for it.
Yes, I was a little stunned, and angry, but not at them, at myself. What did I miss?
Aha! ~ “Trust is an emotional brain state, not just an expectation of behaviour” ~ Paul Thagard, Ph.D.
Trust is as much a belief that someone will behave in a certain way as it is a feeling of confidence in a particular outcome; regardless, it is a complex neural process that is a mix of self, situation and emotions.
INTELIVATE outlines these basic steps to build trust: Integrity, openness, honesty and reliability. That being the case, becoming so attached to an outcome that you ignore your intuition and those glimpses of trust incongruency, it is easy to see why sometimes enthusiastic trust requires the protective signals from your intuitive radar.
Thagard is convincing in stating that trust is not an absolute – halos can tip for even the most well-meaning, especially in adverse circumstances – trust first anyway. You mind may be temporarily hijacked but your heart always finds its way.
Thank heavens our inner star is forever our flawless guide.
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